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| New Field House at PEA; completion 2018. Is it just me, or is that insane for a high school? |
I'm sorry about the dearth of Cuba photos-it's a combination of one C. P. Sellman not sending them yet (he wants to collate or sterilize or something them (he is rather techy), combined with blog problems. But coming soon. Meantime, might as well give the PEA update...(warning- it's kind of boring, might be for grandmothers only).
It was 85 degrees last week, but then weather came back to slap us in the face. We were freezing. I asked F if he was upset about this and he said- no; the sun brings the seniors out on the lawn and he can barely stand the sound of the fun they are having. (Is there a more blissful period of life than final semester of senior year?)
We gave Chico flying lessons for his 16th birthday; he was delighted of course. Actually, no he wasn't- he was shocked. It was as if you are expecting a ride on a moped, and someone suggests the space shuttle. The combination of my ability to figure out (usually) what people really want for their birthday, with Thomas' research ability and sang froid at pulling the trigger; makes us a dream present giving duo. Frederick is hoping we don't sober up before he gets behind the wheel. (Wheel? Throttle?)
On to tennis news: Serena Williams won the Australian open while pregnant. Does anything make you feel like a bigger loser? As most of you know, early pregnancy wasn't by best time. But I digress.
Frederick (who is on the B team of the varsity- of course Exeter has an AA and an AB) had to play the girls of the A varsity; a team his coach said was better than any he had seen in the last ten years. Obviously the first person I told was Andrew; because no one would take this more seriously. " "Oh God, it's a lose lose."
And then he proceeded to detail how Frederick must extinguish every single ounce of chivalry in his skinny body and hit obnoxiously high to her backhand. Unless she likes that.
Well I am sure you can guess what happened- the girls crushed him and his partner-a rather strong calved Michael C. 8-2; then F got beaten 8-5 in singles. Michael got beaten in singles so badly he had a cheering/heckling squad of boys who watched and cheered saying things like: YOU've GOT THIS MICHAEL!!! And if he made one little point, no matter how lame: WAY TO GO MICHAEL! THIS IS WHEN YOU TURN IT ALL AROUND!!!
Cracked me up. In Frederick's defense: the girls were cute; he had never seen one of them before; it was windy. And this last thing- they were better.
On one point we saw (we were literally behind a tree) he aced the girl, and it was a thing of beauty... she said as much.
"Such a good serve!"... and then F proceeded to lose the next three points in a row.
F said a few interesting things: he said he feels less stress when we are visiting-not that he wants to see us every minute; because he doesn't, but he likes knowing we are close.
Also he and his friends have been playing basketball for no reason in between classes.
Now basketball was never Frederick's thing- too much touching other people. (He prefers sports where that is illegal.) But he says it is so hard to find people who will play: either they are experts, and do not want to play with skiers/tennis players; or they play the flute and can't risk acceptance into Yale with a broken hand. Kids - especially at these schools-are so specialized. There is something so sad about it. These little achievers are filling out surveys at school that prove they are doing very little drugs and alcohol, but they are wildly stressed out. Both Jack H. and Frederick's advisor said the same thing to me this weekend, i.e that F was so mellow, so laid back, always equanimous. And he is, to a point.
But I see the bitten skin around his fingers.
Oh this was an interesting story: Frederick told us that his history teacher, who is a Muslim, offered anyone an A in the class who converted to Islam. Frederick says this is not a joke. (who knows? it appears to us to be a social experiment). Here is the amazing part: not one kid has taken him up on it- no highly ambitious agnostic or cynic agreed to the deal. Thomas and I had different takes: Thomas says, God is God...so take the deal. Who cares what you call yourself. And I said, but it would be a lie to your fellow Muslims, wouldn't it? And in this the age of Trump, I literally cannot stomach any lying. I just can't (so don't ask me if you look fat in that dress). But it is a cool experiment, if that is what it was....Frederick hasn't gotten an A in history at that place, so if he does, he will probably be able to tell you which direction Mecca is.
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| Chico's dorm |
Gazing up at the dark sky
spangled with signs and stars,
for the first time, the first, I laid
my heart open to the benign
indifference of the universe.
Now this makes a mother worry- kids have already been sent home on psych leave (suicide risk) and the drumbeat has now begun for the lowers (10th graders) for college. It makes one envy the simpler times when all you had to do was kill a water buffalo and you were considered a grown up.
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| Happy Harkness-ers |
But teenagers are teenagers, and I am sure the little cave men ones were moody too. In Africa, our guide told us that teenaged male elephants are sent to live away from the herd, to live with older males only. Because they are a such pain in everyone's ass, it is less painful if they figure out how to be a grown up elephant away from their parents.
Boarding school is a bit like that- you miss some moments that are probably ok to miss.
Below a photo of F last year - seems like a life time ago; and it breaks my heart knowing how tough those first two weeks were. But it's ok now, it really is. I noticed, for the first time, what he has on his instagram feed- where most kids put the sports they play, or the school they go to, with graduation year- F's has merely the quote below.
"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot.
Nothing is going to get better. It's not. "
Dr. Seuss
Maybe they are learning something over there.
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| Chico's first day. Can't believe it was just 18 months ago. |
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