Photos

For those of you not on instagram...
Tonight is last night here. Thomas is at pilates, then the adult swim area complete with ice bath. He went for a walk on the wild side and ate half a portion of spaghetti Bolognese at lunch. F is still very, very sad about coming home to a new house; plunge pool or no.
The other day when the three of us went rock climbing together was fun. They have put in metal things into the rocks for you to clamber up. It is very much straight up in parts, but you are clipped in so it's not so bad. The bad part was actually the suspension bridge at the top....400 feet up, swaying in the wind. I was almost hyperventilating.
But today Thomas and F went on a more scary one...thank God i declined. The photos are unreal.
When F came back he was quietly euphoric about the excursion. I sent the video to you people...horrible!  Anyway he came back to the room and put himself to bed for a nap.
We have barely scratched the surface here-there are many hikes to do and helicopter rides to take and stars to gaze at. I suspect we will be back. Apparently they have huge thunder storms in August and September, so that gets me out of rock climbing...All in all an incredible place..food is not spectacular (I wonder what Gordon Ramsey thought of it) and service kind of confused Mormon kids, not exactly fresh out of hotel school. But super friendly and the setting is so spellbinding, it is its own show.

Ellie very happy to be done with bridge. We were clipped in

desert life!

Very long way down...I was not there

Springy Break 2014

I am writing to you from the Amangiri, a most ridiculously scenic hotel; but first must tell about Vegas and Grand Canyon.
Lord knows I hate to say something unoriginal, but I do not like Las Vegas: I don't get it.
I think it is the size: the lines at reception, by the pool, at lunch. Also the fact that there is the steady drum beat to get you indoors back to gambling. It is inhuman. Here is an example: I love the crazy-nes of New York New York...a replica of NYC landmark buildings, complete with long fake streets inside. It's adorable. Also incredibly dark and weird. What person would choose to eat at a fake New York deli without any natural light?  Las Vegas visitors do.
I found a starbucks and at the back was what looked like a door..a door one could use...and beyond, holy of holies sunlight. I couldn't believe it..out i went and found an actual table in actual sunlight. When thomas texted me to ask where I was, I was euphoric. I told him I was sitting with a group of other blond euros acting in an erratic way...sipping coffee outside.  Don't get me wrong: I want to like it..I want to be fun and decadent. I just keep looking for a way to walk somewhere.
OH! forgot to tell you that we went to a David Copperfield show where I was picked to go on stage and then forced to lie about a trick. Then i was offered a photo op with him backstage. A German came up to me after and asked if the trick was real, to which I responded-Yes...and he said "The most incredible thing I have seen in my life!!!" I felt bad for him...or maybe not.  DC was surprisingly funny and more than a little weird afterward when he came down a dark hallway saying only "can you keep a secret??" it sounded like a bad priest.
Anyway..grand canyon was as awe inspiring as usual. We had no reservations and yet got lucky and got a very nice 100 year old cabin on the rim.  One of these days I must actually walk to the bottom, but alas, no time.
The  scenery is some of the most spectacular I have ever seen; it is almost too much to take in. And I  love showing Frederick the US of A for a change. We stopped in some little town (not the one with the Road Kill cafe from instagram..."you kill it we grill it", but another one.  Mexican food. F and I know what to do: keep it simple-Chicken tacos, Cokes.  Thomas-mr I weigh nothing and eat nothing due to cholestoerol starts off badly.
"do you have sparkling water?"
No 
What kind of beans are in the beans and rice?
Refried.
 Do you have black beans?
No.
At this point F and I start speaking German to him..telling him to lighten up on the Vegan schtick. At this point we are convinced we are going to get run out of town due to the absurd WE ARE FROM CALIFORNIA WHEN WE ARE NOT GALAVANTING AROUND EUROPE sign on our heads. Not to mention we arrived in a porsche -the rental from Las Vegas.
Thomas gives up and wanders in the direction of a sign he saw that he claims said "espresso and books. " I tell him that must have been a mirage. He has been seeing a lot of them: at the Road Kill cafe there was a sign that said NO FIREARMS;  when he got inside he thought the Hostess Will Seat You sign said
The hostess will kill you.
He was clearly feverish...by the time we got here he was actually sick. I was so gob smacked by the scenery, I went for a five mile run/walk that was very easy due to my incessant stopping to take pictures. T ate nothing and went to bed.
Poor guy...he now weights only five pounds more than I do.
Must go rock climbing now. But amangiri style which i believe includes a person strapped to the rock next to you holding a cappuccino. AND newly checked in are the Victoria  and David Beckham family with Gordon Ramsey and family. Zillion kids and nannies between them.
I am going to tell Ramsey my pesto is better than his. It's the goat cheese.

Happy New Year.....

So we survived the Almhof New Year's eve, which can be a famously bumpy ride: a long formal dinner followed by some truly terrible dancing. The best years are when there is some sort of late night scandal: a lover's quarrel, (preferably a lesbian one); someone dancing with a precariously placed toupee; a young Russian mother getting her 12 year old child drunk...you know, the usual. Unfortunately welcoming 2014 was tame, and we had to solider on without much entertainment.

It can be depressing witnessing a lot of unhappy people pretending so hard not to be. Sometimes though, one sees a family that is weathering the human storm-happy to be where they are: dancing in the alps in a very good dress.

My friend and I watched one of them last night: this Greek couple that has been coming forever. They have piles of money and children; and they had this long, joyous, sexy dance together.
Next to them in the dark was of course Mrs. Schneider: dirndl on, arms high; encouraging them silently to keep going.


Photos soon my pretties.

Christmas 2013

Sorry sorry sorry this is late. I know the San Francisco crowd is eagerly awaiting news about the Brighams' first trip to Lech. For now I will simply post a few pictures...but suffice it to say the Geneva crew took this town by storm.
Highlights were many: Christmas eve with the German Christmas carols; introducing them to our friends from here; all of 8 us barreling down in one pack at breakneck speed; the boys sharing the first place podium under Austrian skies..(how fitting plural of sky is that word!) More soon. xx

Luis discussing Frederick's skis with the guru of Lech

Girls atop Maroikopf..

Breakfast in the room xmas morning

After mass with accordion player

with Luis in Tagesbar

Thomas and Kate in dining room

MFB and Harumi surveying the snow

All good things must come to an end.....

It is now really cold and rainy here and the Schneiders have left; So, alas, must we. We had some nice days even in the cold...watched a triathalon where these poor people were absolutely frozen. The lech team (you can enter as a team) won. We stayed to watch the Lech runner go, and it was something to behold. Her leg consisted of a 12 kilometer run around semi flat (and therefore, semi not) lech.  I cannot tell you how beautiful it was to watch her. We were standing in freezing rain and she was bouncing around in shorts and those high socks people wear now (compression socks) pony tail..bounce bounce waiting for her team-mate- the bicycle rider to come in. And then she took off like a little gazelle...like someone was chasing her. Up up this hill she went, past a man on a mountain bike (!) he was not part of the competition..and he was looking behind him as if to say Shit!!!! do I owe her money???!!!! and she tore past him, into the mountains out of view. It choked me up of course: Run girl run.

Before they left, K and I took the kiddies to a bridge. In typical K fashion, the plans were vague..something about a bridge..blah blah.....swim in the river after, blah. Ok I ask,....is there a walk? No she says. Ok, so I come in ballet flats. Because this is Austria and she is a Schneider, there was of course a walk. 30 minutes up hill in my flats. Then onto a suspension bridge that is swinging  in the wind...three hundred feet in the air. Swinging a lot. K was scared. I was beyond that. Something new: Naird. or Fraid. In any case, it was a whole new word.  The kids scamper across, then turn, and from 200 meters away at the end, start to yell and run at top speed towards us. Ok first of all this is forbidden..no running. second it is making the thing shake. Little girls start to cry. K and I scream STOP RUNNING!!! but I (due to dramatic nature) am convinced that something has gone wrong and perhaps someone has jumped off.  No..these geniuses wanted to try a 200 yard dash at speed, and we were in the way.
When I got to the end all of them looked at me and laughed because

Bridge 300 feet up

Lake Thomas saw on his hike 

horses

F and Luis

On Thomas' hike..looks like another planet in the fog

I was whiter than they thought humanly possible.
thomas took the kids to some park another day where they swing on bridges and ropes...I opted out. (there was no cafe..what can I say)
Also we went on a last hike to a little hut with Frederick and the manager here and her son whom F loves. It was first thing in the morning and both F and I were feeling slow and kind of hating it all. Why up hill all the time why why why. Pain always pain in the mountains. But there is often a reward, and sure enough we walked right into a huge open field up in these crazy hills where there was a group of insanely beautiful horses. It was like a movie...all five us of gaped.  Then we carried on along a flat ridge to the hut where there was of course wiener schnitzel and sausages and those crazy semi in-bred type of locals who live up there and perhaps, just perhaps are marrying cousins. But I am not here to judge.- I am here to eat topfenstrudel.
Oh! the Brighams are making plans to come to lech this Christmas! this will be something: all of Charlie Brigham's grandchildren skiing in one group, speaking a three languages between them-
The thought of it chokes me up.
But then again, everything in this town does. 

Lech ...

Let's see....the big story I suppose of this whole summer has been the weather: sun has shone an abnormal amount. Also Thomas is my new running coach; trying to get me to run something faster per minute than I do presently. He slips right into the Prussian track coach mode..(see photo of him on his bicycle) ...I am running around in front of him while he times me. Look how happy he looks!
Anyway it has been lovely....below some photos; but they never do it justice.

terrace at a hotel near us where we eat lunch

Ellie Checking pulse

Bottle of goo Thomas planted above me to keep me going

In front of Schneider barn

looking out of the Schneider kitchen..

Geneva

out of our hotel. 

Nice trip to Geneva to see our client and of course Geneva's newest residents! We...had a great time with the kiddies in their new home town. Everyone seems really relaxed and happy and starting to learn Frenh already. too cute. Frederick said on the way home how lucky they were to be moving there..We swam in the lake, ate in chic restaurants, saw their new neighborhood, saw the front of their schools, saw the single most insane firework show I have ever seen; the list goes on. Our hotel is this incredibly romantic place with tons of Arabs escaping the heat of their native lands. One group had a room reserved just for..I am not sure, entertaining the family. This was complete with a stove where they cooked their own food. Bizarre. Also they hung around in front of their rooms like it was a youth hostel. In their robes...
below some photos. Andrew's feet are featured because he remarked that his feet had "never looked better". Margaret and I could not disagree; so I recorded it for posterity. Feast your eyes on Brigham feet that are better than usual. Maybe it is the French influence. Speaking of which the entire family is looking wildly chic...all of them in cool outfits at all times even at the beach (lake). They fit right in

Was I lying? .. Poetry. 

scrawny legs all over town

Me in the most amazing train seat! they bring you coffee!

Fireworks

Thomas off 5 high dive...

Yodellayheehoo

Ok back in the mountains which have been rather balmy. On the way to Lech we stopped to visit the parents in Bad Ragaz, a place that is part five star hotel, part hospital, part spa: very strange and wonderful. I have many friends and relatives who would happily check in, and die there. It is filled with people recovering from hip surgery, or plastic surgery, or just lots of advanced Swiss beauty treatments. I have never seen anything like it.
There are doctors who will give you a new nose,  physical therapists, a golf course for the Russian husbands whiling away the hours after their wives' boob jobs, swimming pools, spas, many restaurants including one with a few stars, or hats, can't remember, on and on. And in an almost ridiculously scenic Swiss village.
Anyway we left, and are now in Lech, which has been really beautiful. Trudging up and down and then bathing in the the largesse of the Schneiders. The first day we got cocky, and went up something fairly long and steep; Thomas took the below photo of me passed out before I could make it to lunch.
Tomorrow we go see the Brighams (yay) and have a petit business meeting in Geneva.

Chico et moi on the balcony at Bad Ragaz

Pool

Me in one of many weird places to sit at BR hotel

Lech...finally a little downhill portion

                                                                                                                F playing baseball at Bad Ragaz lawn

Lech...looks like me, but it is our  friend Devon

Thank heaven for little girls....

So we had to give the little UMs back...Thomas made the long car ride to the Lisbon airport alone with them and was quite sad when he came back. He said he kept thinking of them going off with the airline person, (a person we don't even know!)  past the security, out of his view. Oh how they amuse us! And in case there was any doubt, there really is a difference between girls and boys. With girls, there is so little urgency, so little instinct for aggression. Also friends and shell collecting take on such a huge role. They made friends with a little English girl in their class named Spencer (or Simon...Hanna kept getting confused) who lives on a boat. At this point Frederick got interested. Where? What kind of a boat? is it a houseboat or a boat that can sail? None of these details were known by the girls. They just knew she lived on a boat and they wanted her to come for a play date. We don't do play dates in Europe girls, I can barely feed the three of you (F has never asked for a play date in portugal ever). Kate announces she lives 12 hours away from here. BY CAR OR PLANE? asks Frederick. "Car..."
but you can tell she is guessing.  Before their tennis lesson we had a ritual of getting iced teas at the snack bar; and like many lines in europe it is chaos. For once I decided to stay out of it, and let them order for themselves. After many minutes i look over and they have not progressed an inch. Every portuguese grandmother and chubby English kid is pushing ahead. Finally Hanna comes over and I think they need more money. Aunt Ellie? yes Hanna? I figured out where Spencer lives! Great Hanna, but what about your place in line? I look over and young Kate is being buffeted around like a paper airplane in a storm...farther and farther from iced tea and their lesson has started. Hanna! why did you get out of line??!!
She lives in Singapore! I just asked her!
Kate is now being trampled, but she just stands there clutching her little five euro note in the air like this will signal something to the iced tea man. Hanna get back in line!!

The funniest was when they went carting...god we laughed. It was like a slow speed chase; a sunday drive rather than a car race. There was one father yelling at his son to OVERTAKE THEM!! OVERTAKE THEM! Kate was ahead because that is just how it started, and the others were too polite to pass her. So round and round they went like they had all day. Finally Hanna very, very gently edged past Kate, then lapped her, then Kate announced she, kate "was ahead again". And Hanna nods! Frederick Schumacher Wehlen, in his self appointed role as sheep herder to his girl cousins, was watching from his line at the real go cart track and was nearly apoplectic at the bonhomie and slowness. 

Besides  collecting shells and singing along to the Bee Gees  (such a bonus for me) they seem to like to name things: they even named a clam shell (picked clean mind you..dainty eaters they are not),  'Shelly' and planned to take it home until the waitress mistakenly assumed otherwise and cleared the plates. Shelly! Thomas almost died laughing. I thought we were going to lose him.

We were a good combination the three Wehlens. I got to be head girl at the boarding school and plan all the fun stuff, while Frederick and Thomas poured over charts of the girls' caloric intake, sleep patterns, irrational fears of sharks in pools; and irrational belief seat belts are optional. Thomas was so flummoxed that Kate got a cold. On his watch! in the summer! I kid you not he kept analyzing the temperature and scratching his head. It does not make sense! It is almost impossible to transfer bacteria  at this temperature!!!

girls with BFF Spencer (or maybe it was Simon) from Singapore

Hanna Paddle boarding

Hanna in new tennis dress

Kate in my old sunglasses

Kiddies after sailing

small but mighty